2017 Grammys Fashion Review

by - Monday, February 13, 2017


The cleavage was out, Twenty One Pilots' pants came off, and live F-bombs were dropped on live television. All in a day of The GRAMMYs. This year, it was all about the women. Adele. Beyonce. Lady Gaga. The kinda average song by a blonde-haired, sneaker wearing Katy Perry. Either way, the ladies opened, filled, and ended the awards - and it was all sorts of amazing. The outfits, however, are something else.

The shiniest shortest dress ever:
Heidi Klum. To be honest, it's basically a long sequined tee. She's not kidding anyone by saying it's a dress. Even if she wore tights with this, you'd still say it isn't a dress. But hey, if I had legs like that...

The most floral florally floral outfit.
Elle King. Wearing a floral print wasn't enough for Elle King. No, she had to make sure it looked like it was growing off her dress, and pairing it with a floral crown. Never such a thing as too much floral, right?

The most well-dressed zombie to walk the red carpet
Lea Michele. With her slicked down black hair and her pink diseased looking eyes, she already looked like she had two weeks of hard nights before she turned up at the Grammys. But nothing was going to stop her, as she already looked like she was dead on the inside.

The Shiny Award
CeeLo Green. Tin Man was searching for a heart. CeeLo Green was searching for an outfit to be out of this world. So, inspired by C-3PO, the portable shiny freezer bags you generally keep meat cold in, and a Ferrero Rocher chocolate tower - someone needs to tell CeeLo Green that the Oscars statues are only needed two weeks from now.

The biggest big as skirt you can ever imagine:
Rihanna. Despite the tiniest top ever (which I will admit, looks great that it fits perfectly and doesn't obstruct her famous chest tattoo too much), her skirt had all the fabric she could ever need for three more Awards Season outfits. Best summarised by my workmate - "you could hide a table under that thing.'

The Best 'The Weeknd' Dress Up:
Jason DeRulo. Because nothing says staying relevant quite like copying the hairdo that made The Weeknd popular in 2015.


And now, for the more bigger awards...

The Best Dressed Nominees:
Carrie Underwood. It's a bit of a cop-out best-dressed pick as she's usually so well dressed, but it's a beautiful red beaded dress that I would love to have in my own closet. Not that I'd know where to wear it, other than to sit in my room and feel pretty in it...

Tori Kelly. As for this dress, I'd hate to have this in my closet, but it suits Tori so well. It's fun, flirty, in a brilliant shade of green, and just compliments her style and her hair. It's just a well-put together outfit.

But if I have to give the Best Dressed award to someone, it's gotta be...
Chrissy Teigen. Always daring enough to show off her skin, I think what I appreciate the most in this dress is the detailing and cut that makes the dress look sexy, but not overdoing it to be too revealing. The black is classy, the cut flattering, and it just hangs beautifully on her. Add in the great makeup and her rich hair colour - she's got it nailed.

Which leaves the Worst Dressed Nominees as...
Katy Perry. When I first started sewing, sometimes I sewed the wrong back pieces together or sewed the wrong skirt piece upside down. However, whoever did Katy Perry's outfit put two completely different pieces together. It's as if Katy's dress was decided by a crazy outfit flip book. It's a real shame because her hair is great on its own. Her top is great on its own. Her skirt is great on its own. Put it together and she looks like a paintbrush with a shiny handle.

Halsey. For taking it too casual and looking like she rolled out of bed in blue satin PJs from the 90s.

So, who's Worst Dressed?
Anyone who wears a Trump outfit - and is smiling about it. She doesn't even deserve having her name mentioned.

But of course, who could ever forget this award; the Lady Gaga Award.
Lady Gaga doesn't fail. With fierceness and more underboob than you ever thought would ever be allowed, Lady Gaga just did her thing. And I'm okay with this.

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