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Reality's weight

currently: composing. While watching Criminal Minds. Reed has a new hairstyle...

So I've been writing as usual. And I'm trying something different here. I've been reading a lot of E.E Cummings. Which I have to say I'm really enjoying. So I've been inspired by him to write this poem (which I may have to use for my uni course...we'll see.)

You Don't Know
you.Come up
You don't know how I cr u m b l . e .

Your sly smiles shoot
. fast as bullets
my he(straight through)art

If we...

you don't know what you mean to me.

Feel free to critque. I could really use it. Or just tell me you have no clue what it means and that it sucks. Feel free to do that too.

I have to say lately, I've been faced with a lot of frustration. School, friends, life - it takes its toll. I feel like the control I'm meant to hold is just being grabbed away from me bit by bit. I can't help think if it's because I'm wanting to keep too much power, or that I'm too weak to hold my own. It's hard to go into it without naming names, or really describing the situation. But I don't want to seem like the bad guy with the big head. It's hard to find a place of balance in this situation.

Maybe it's because my mind has been other places. I admit that there are moments where I will force my mind to wander and float because reality is too much to take in, it's feeling heavier than gravity.

But I do know that by doing this, I'm lying to myself.

Somewhere along the lines, the floodgates will open.

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