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currently: listening to "Come to The River" by Parachute Band. Good memories :D

So I've been meaning to blog post for ages!
It's been pretty full on lately. So I'm gonna make a kinda hasty blog post before I have to go to bed.

First off - GET SMART WAS AMAZING.
I admit, when I got spontaneously talked into it - I was a bit wary. Cause I would be with a bunch of hardcore Christians I didn't really know and that I wasn't really apart of. Cause even though I've been going to my church for the past...7(?) years, I'm not at all that close to anyone there. When your school schedule clashes with church events, you start skipping stuff and missing stuff and things happen without of church. Pretty much how I'm on the outside circle of church.

First night (Tuesday) was only a night service. From my house, the Get Smart Conference is about an hour/hour and a half drive on the other side of town. We were all carpooling - so I was gonna get stuck in a car with people I didn't really know, other than my sister (who I ended up riding cars with the whole time. Makes it easier to get picked up and dropped off together.)
Anyway, the first night was good. One of my friends (I do have a few friends at church, just not heaps) and me got up front to dance it out on the alter. Sweet stuff - though at the time, didn't know the songs we were actually singing to...
What's great about a youth conference is the energy. There's always some energy.

Anyway, preaching was good. (but for the sake of time and your interest in reading this, I'm moving on.) Got home about 11:45pm (we got lost on the way back...)

Next day: 5:30am wake up, to get to church at 6:30am. WHOLE DAY at the conference. So there was more preaching, more worship, and I watched Kung Fu Panda during the 2pm-7pm break we had. Also went to Maccas (McDonalds) which is near the airport there. Deluxe Cheeseburgers are so good. And cheap at $2. I started to get to know the other people from my church who were at the conference with me.
And at the night service - it went off. Healing session. ALWAYS interesting cause that's when the miracles happen before your eyes. Like a guy who's one leg was shorter than the other. So we all mass prayed, and on screen and on stage, you can see this guy's leg growing. This guy (he's quite young. Like 20s.) gets up from the seat he was being prayed for and was like "It's gone. The pain is gone."
Flipping awesome.

Thursday: 5:30am again up. My other friend was well enough to join us. So it was like "Yay, another friend to hang out with." More worship, more preaching, more of all that. It was good - you learn so many new things - though I admit, I was really feeling sleepy. Sam and Omega from Parachute Band (www.myspace.com/parachuteband) were there for the Musos elective - where they talked about music and songwriting within worship which was pretty cool - except for me almost falling asleep. It takes a lot of willpower NOT to sleep in something that is suppose to be super cool, but when the room is drained of energy, you are too. I felt seriously bad that I wasn't amped up more..but you know, 5:30am start.
At break it was a little better. Btw - Ham Sub of the Day at Subways - not actually that bad. But I think I'm attracted to the taste of cheap prices.
The service at night was also pretty tiring too..I couldn't help but feel sleepy...
Though the drive back - that woke me up. The guy who I was with has this awesome old green roarer of a car. Like driving with a lawnmower engine. And his stereo system is pretty cool.


Friday night was the epic one. 5:30am up again...
Worship was GREAT. Parachute Band are amazing live. Had a few "Praise Grenades" where everyone goes crazy jumping about and moshing to praise God. It was amazing - Though did feel a little tired when the same preacher from last night spoke...You do try to stay awake.
But the one after that was the Healing session again with Andrew Kabala. WOW. Honestly, that session was WOW. Everyone was praying for each other, people falling under the power of God. (which to a normal person would just appear that everyone is fainting. Or being pushed over. Trust me, they fall over from the power of God. And there are people that catch them, don't worry.)
Then Andrew Kabala started getting the people he prayed for to start praying for other people, and then they started falling under the power of God. Like a whole domino effect going on.
I was up front on the alter (alter, not stage) wanting to get prayed over for my lousy jaw which has been giving me pain since October last year. These little kids came up to me and were all "How do we pray for her? Who's gonna catch her?" I smiled to myself cause even though my eyes were closed, and I looked like I was all hands up and praying - I was fully aware of how unsure they felt. But they prayed over me, and when I start feeling myself come under the power of God, I let myself fall down, but not fall backwards where these 12 year old kids won't get crushed, but can still catch me and lie me down.
It's a really good feeling when you're under the power of God. A strange one, but good. My chest was tight feeling, but my jaw was all warm, like I could actually feel the blood circulate around it and burn a little.
After a while, I got off the ground (slowly) and started getting back into the praying. Then I started praying for other people with other people in groups - cause I felt that's what I needed to do. When you pray, you're not praying to the person, you're praying and talking to God. But you see these people fall under the power, right underneath your hands. It's crazy but amazing. You can't feel such a power.
Then some lady was like "If you've been prayed for, can you go back to your seats." So yeah, being obedient I did - had a bit of personal worshipping etc...but then I could feel like I was suppose to pray for my friend right next to me. She was all "I've sorta been prayed for, but I don't think I'm one of those people who falls under the power and falls" and stuff. But I felt God say to me that I should pray for her. So when the time came about, I said "Come on, I'm praying for you."
She was all reluctant at first. She didn't think anything will happen. But when you start praying, amazing things do happen. She eventually fell under the power (I wasn't the only one praying for her, another member of my church was with us, and so at least it wasn't me just catching her.) Anyway, when she fell, she started crying, and I just kept praying for her as I hugged her. Wow, the emotion and power was strong.
The prayer and healing session went on for ages. For almost 3 straight hours. We skipped lunch and the 3rd session of the day and didn't realise. So we had an impromptu worship session. And this was amazing.

When you praise God, it's pretty much singing how much you do love him, with all this emotion. At one point during this, I wanted to kneel, but I felt a bit self conscious. I felt God saying to me "It's okay to kneel. When you kneel, it's not defeat to me." So I kneel, and I started crying as God spoke to me.
He told me how I should never feel like I am not strong enough, that I am defeated when I surrender to God. Because when I surrender to God, I'm not meant to feel like I'm too weak, it just means that I'm allowing God to take my side. I'm never meant to feel alone - which is something I've been dealing with for the past 7 months. (I've had moments over that time where I cry for no reason - I was afraid I was suffering from depression because I wasn't sure why I would cry so much or why I would feel this pain.) When I knelt to God, God just wanted me to know how much he loved me.

He told me that the people that were around me was his way of showing how much he loved me too, and that the love that I have for this people was needed to be spread around. People came into my mind at that time and I know God was trying to say that they were missing the love that God was wanting to share, so he wants me give the same love that God has for his children. The only reason I'm able to love these people is because God loves them, without it, I couldn't love them like I do.

God wanted to make me strong, and make me part of his army. To help lead people to the love that they were missing. But most of all, he wanted to let me know how proud he was of me and how much he cared for me.


I cried my mascara off.

After a while, when I thought I had stopped crying, I got up again.
The worship band were singing "King of All Days" by Hillsong United at the time. I started singing along - but when it got to the chorus and the words "Your life's gonna lead me home" (the actual lyrics are "Your light's gonna lead me home" but for some reason they had the wrong lyrics on the slide) I started crying all over again.
I don't know why I was crying again. I'm pretty sure it was relief, and just me crying out to God, thanking him that he was gonna lead me home. That I actually have a home with God, and that there is a love like no other waiting for me.

Even as I'm writing this now, I'm feeling emotional all over again. I'm listening to the song now.

Its just that so often, you feel alone. You feel like it's you battling against the world that is just unforgiving, and that there is nothing on your side. There is no arms wanting to hug you, to tell you everything is alright, to save you from yourself and your own vices. But that Friday - I called out to God again, and I was so relieved that his arms were waiting for me this whole time.

Eventually - I did stop crying. And I felt so much better - though I didn't really like the fact that my mascara and eyeshadow had been completely wiped away as I was trying to wipe my tears. Now I realise why people carry makeup with them.
The worship session finished (after 45 minutes. Didn't feel like that at all) and as soon as I walked out, I wrote down all God said to me in that time in my notebook.

It was good after all that. Break was pretty uneventful - another deluxe cheeseburger. Yum.
Got to the night service, and it went off! Praise grenades (these are not literal grenades btw) went off one after another, after another. MASSIVE MOSH CROWD. and bruising from my end. If you know me, I'm not exactly a very tall or big person. I'm not really made to mosh. But you dance, you scream, you worship till you think Hell has caved in.
Chris Hill was the preacher. He is a Black Preacher. A very Black Preacher. I'm not being racist - if you imagine those churches with the Big Black Gospel Preacher screaming the house down - he was like that. He started rapping. "New Zealand, New Zealand, New Zealand is on fire. We don't need the devil cause the devil is a liar!" and "My G-O-D is B-I-G". Even me being Kiwi-ised Asian was getting into acting like a lousy white boy Gangster. It was THAT fun! And the sermon just got you fired up for God's power. It was like WOW. The energy, the screaming, the cheering and the fire (God's fire - not literal fire) was just INTENSE.
Then there was more praise grenades, more cheering, and when we did "finish", we didn't finish for another 15-30 minutes cause we just kept cheering how great God was. You just don't stop. You don't stop God's power- even if some people have to start packing up the chairs.

But you know, we did have to stop. We all have to go home eventually. But the energy I had within me kept me up till about 1:30am. I was just so happy, so on fire for God, that I just wanted to scream it from the rooftops how much I loved him. And I honestly DID NOT want it to end.



The conference - probably the BEST thing that has happened these holidays, and I'd tie it 1st with Stage Challenge in the whole year. It was just - WOW. God, you're awesome.

Get Smart 09 - It is all about becoming the revolution for this broken generation that is crying out for something more. It's about becoming God's army to fight against the Devil. No longer do we want to see a nation that has the highest teenage pregnancies, the highest suicide rate...it's all about wanting to see the world change.

God told me he wants me to help change the world.
I want to give my life to see that happen. There is so much more for this world.
And His light will lead us all home.


I hope I can go to Get Smart next year.
But for now, bed. :P Though I'm living as a changed person, I still have school tomorrow.

Hey, if I had it my way, I'd still be at that conference. haha.

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